Monday, October 6, 2014

Balance in the new year




this month is October, for us pagans its the month of the last harvest, Memorial day for all those who died this year and New years eve. We call it Samhain. This month weighs heavy on many of us. For others its just a day to celebrate and dress up to have fun. As I wright this my birthday quickly approaches. 2 min to go. I turn 40 this year. I guess this is my year of introspection.
I just spent the last couple of hours watching “Apocalypse man” Its about a mans world view on how the Human race is doing in the grand scheme of things. His name is Michale Ruppert. He has passed on . They claim suicide but I believe otherwise.
I listened to the whole thing contemplating everything he said. Most of which I agree with.
And as I said earlier Mortality weighs heavy on my heart this month.
Over the years I have lost many people I loved. My Mother and Grandmother to cancer, a close friend to cancer, and just recently my Aunts Father-n-law died of cancer. I have also lost my Grandfather for other medical issues.
Over the last 10 years or so I have “woken up” and have become a “truther”.
I am also a wife and mother. I struggle daily with how dark the world has really become.
There is an old saying. “its as bad as you think and they are out to get you” well its true, but its even worse than we can Imagen.
How do we find balance? When does keeping up on the news become Obsession? When does ignoring the news become denial? Where is the happy medium? Whats the point of watching the news when its full of lies? Even the “truthers” report lies from time to time by accident.
If something big happened tomorrow and we all met death because of it what would be our regrets?
Would it be that you spent to much time on the pc and not enough time living? What would you be doing if computers and smart phones did not exist? Seriously, what would you be doing?
Would it be to go explore some where you've never been? Or you just wish you had more time with your loved ones?
The most fundamental question of our existence....”why are we here?”
Do we throw our hands up at the enormity of the worlds problems and run off and do our own thing or do we fight harder? What legacy are we leaving for our kids?
...Happy birthday to me...
I write these things not expecting answers from people. I want people to ask the questions. Ask them to your self. I dont need the answers you do!

I dont know what I would be doing. I want to move out into the woods some where and live in tune with the land. But I wonder is that just me wanting to hide from all the evil in the world?
I know If the Apocalypse came tomorrow I would regret not spending more time with my kids, so obviously thats where I need to start. I dont know how yet but I will learn.

I want each and every one of you who bother to read this , ask these questions of your self.


If I receive any hateful, mean troll comments, I will report them, block you and delete them from the post. I am done with hate filled trolls that have nothing better to do in their day than to wright shitty comments on posts!